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Michael O'Brien

Creating Better Tomorrows

By InnerVoice

April 27^th, 2018

MY LAST BAD DAY

My Last Bad Day was July 11th, 2001. During a training ride, I was hit head-on by an SUV going around 40 miles per hour. I remember the sound of me hitting his front grill, then being smashed into his windshield, the screech of his brakes, and then the thud I made as I got tossed to the asphalt below.

I was unconscious for several minutes until the EMTs arrived. I knew my situation was grim as I lay motionless and in the worst pain of my life.

It was so bad that even the thought of moving hurt.

But I still had a little humor in me. I like to use it to lighten tense situations, and this one was an 11 out of a 10 on the tense scale. So, I asked the EMTs, “How’s my bike?” It’s a question that only another cyclist can appreciate.

As I waited for the trauma helicopter to arrive, I remember willing myself not to fall asleep. It was my mantra, “stay awake Michael, don’t fall asleep.” I thought if I fell asleep, I may never wake up again. When I heard the whirl of the helicopter’s blades, I remember promising myself that if I lived, life would be different. I would stop chasing happiness and just be.

Before my accident, I chased happiness like a hamster on a wheel. I was a human doer, but not a human being. I thought that once I got that new car, the next victory, or a promotion, I would be happy. And they did make me happy for a bit, but soon my happiness vanished like a vapor finish line and left behind only hope. The hope made me think that if I just kept chasing, I would catch happiness for good. When I came out of ICU swollen and in traction, life was different but not in the way that I wanted. I was angry, worried, and scared. The doctors told me I would have a lifetime of limitations and dependencies. When the hospital got dark and lonely, I would often cry myself to sleep asking myself, “Why me? Why did this happen to me?”

As my recovery continued, I finally had my shift and started to ask myself a different question, ‘Why not me?’ I then knew that I had to change my perspective so I could focus on being the best version of myself.

Mr 83%

My dream was to play sports professionally. When I was younger, I wasn't interested in school. I was an okay student but not a great one. Privately, I would call myself Mr. 83% because it seemed that my was comfort zone was C+ to B-.

I never felt confident in school. I still vividly remember the time in the 3rd grade when my teacher lowered his reading expectations for me because he didn’t think I could handle the level set for my classmates. I felt so embarrassed and stupid. To this day, I believe his intent was pure, but his kindness bruised my ego and set up a belief that I wasn’t smart. In school, I felt dumb, but when I was competing I felt different. In sports, I won trophies and All-Star team selections. I believed I was somebody.

By the time I was finishing my junior year in high school I knew I wasn’t going pro. I was okay with that because for the first time I finally felt like I had some potential in my schooling. I still remember the day when I went to my chemistry teacher, Mr. Smout, and asked to be selected for Advanced Placement (AP) Chemistry. I wasn’t his best student, but in chemistry, I was better than Mr. 83%. I barely made the standard for AP, and it would have been hard to argue with his decision if he’d said no. He approved the course and gave me one of the most significant confidence boosts in my life. He also demonstrated how one person could help shift your perspective.

He’s one of the reasons why I’m an executive coach, speaker, and author today.

creating Better Tomorrows

My mantra, Creating Better Tomorrows, was born during my rehab sessions. In rehab, the measurement of success was degrees of flexion. Just getting one more degree was unbelievably painful. I suffered more there than at any time on my bike. But I kept repeating to myself, “Work hard today to make tomorrow better.” My mantra helped me get through my rough patches, and it still works today after a tough training or racing day.

To be blunt, one of the things I’ve learned about myself through this process is that I'm a tougher MFer than I ever thought. I always knew I was resilient, but I didn't fully appreciate my super-power until I had to deal with recovery and some career shifts. Like our breath, all of our moments are temporary - nothing lasts forever.

Tomorrow always brings new opportunity.

“At this point in my cycling career, I have one rule, life is too short to ride with assholes. There are plenty of kind, giving, and funny guys and gals who are fast as hell. If I’m not riding solo and exploring, then those type of folks are part of my peloton.”

my love of bikes

I still remember my first ride without training wheels. I flew down my driveway with the wind in my hair - no helmet back then. It felt like I was going sixty miles per hour. For the first time, I believed I could go anywhere – I had the freedom to explore. At that moment, cycling was in my blood. A few years later, my family moved, and our neighbor was the bike-builder Georgena Terry, who would fuel my love of bikes.

I found bike racing by watching CBS Sports' coverage of The Tour de France with John Tesh and his techno soundtracks. The gritty European cyclists inspired me to enter my first bike race. I came in second to a guy more than twice my age. He had a $700 bike. I was shocked that anyone would spend that amount of money on a bike. Oh, those were the days.

Some of those athletes and icons really inspired me - their posters covered my bedroom walls while I was growing up. In hindsight, it created an unhealthy sense of comparison as I would judge my life against the life that they were willing to show the public. Now I’m inspired by my daughters and others in their generation. I see what they are doing to promote unity and equality and it emotionally moves me. I know the world will be better because of them and their peers.

"The first time I shaved my legs when I was sixteen was a bloody nightmare. Once I finished, our bathroom looked like a crime scene. My mom just looked at me, shook her head, and walked away. Luckily, I got better at it over time.”

World Bicycle Relief

When I left corporate America to start my executive coaching firm, so many people told me I had to write my memoir. They told me it would be great for business and securing speaking gigs. Intellectually, I understood what they were saying, but it didn’t inspire me. My message wasn’t about the money and I knew I couldn’t write it for that. So, we decided to donate the proceeds to cycling advocacy.

At first, I wanted to give to two organizations – one global and the other U.S. domestic. I knew right away that World Bicycle Relief would be my global organization. Their mission to help girls conquer the challenge of distance by giving them mobility fit perfectly into my journey. On my Last Bad Day, I lost my mobility - it’s something that the 1st world takes for granted. Then, if we lose it, we would do anything to have it back. That’s how I felt. In many ways, my emotions tie back to my first bike ride when I felt the wind in my hair. I felt free, and I hoped that my story could help the reader and those supported by World Bicycle Relief discover their freedom. I also reached out to domestic cycling advocacy groups, but my story got caught up in their bureaucracy.

As a result, I decided to give it all to World Bicycle Relief.

Photo courtesy Katie Bolling | World Bicycle Relief

perspective

I've received a ton of terrific feedback from Shift: Creating Better Tomorrows. My most precious feedback, hands down, came from my daughters. I wrote Shift for my two daughters because they were too young at the time to remember our family’s fight back and how kick-ass their mom was in holding our family together. When they read it and said that they loved it, it meant everything to me. I still get goosebumps thinking about that moment.

Beyond my daughters, I’ve been blown away by how Shift has changed lives. A few months after its release, a young woman came to a talk I was giving. She questioned why she came because she hit two motorcyclists while driving several months prior. They lived, but she was dealing with a massive emotional burden. After finishing Shift, she sent me a letter. In it she wrote…”as you wrote, “I knew if I didn’t push myself out of my comfort zone, I would be settling for less than my best.” From that day, from that sentence forward, more than ever I have felt a sense of clarity and closure about the day that seems like a rain cloud over my life, and it’s all because of a different perspective.”

My focus was always on the message of my story. I wanted to give the public a relatable story that could help people discover that they can get past anything with a shift in perspective and a trusting peloton. And I think Shift has accomplished just that.

Keep Pedaling

Having survived my Last Bad Day, I know that I can handle anything. It’s my superpower today. So, when times get tough, and my inner critic shows up, I say, “Thanks for coming, but I don’t need you. Take a seat and watch how it’s done.”

My journey back proved that I could shift my mindset in any situation. It’s a feeling of total confidence knowing that I can get through anything when I keep pedaling regardless if I’m competing on or off the field.

Footnotes

Words by Michael O'Brien, Photos courtesy of Michael O'Brien, Marco Catini Photography and Katie Bolling, Editor Cody Royle, Published by Travis McKenzie, Copyright NTSQ Sports Group

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FootNotes

Words by Michael O'Brien, Photos courtesy of Michael O'Brien, Marco Catini Photography and Katie Bolling, Editor Cody Royle, Published by Travis McKenzie, Copyright NTSQ Sports Group

Colin O'Brady

Michael O'Brien

Creating Better Tomorrows

FootNotes

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Season 3