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Lottie Bildirici

Food Is Medicine

By InnerVoice

March 1^st, 2019

I felt in control again

When I was 14, I found a bump on my neck. I went to the doctor and was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. It ended up becoming my identity in high school because it was such a traumatic thing that happened to me. I had chemotherapy and radiation and got through it fairly quickly - six months or so - but I still spent a lot of time through high school trying to get away from that persona. In my senior year, a bunch of my friends were doing a half marathon to raise money for a local cancer center. I found it to be the perfect opportunity to feel like I was doing something to give back. Plus, I was doing something cool with my friends. I went out and did the race, and my one goal was not to walk. I finished the race without walking, and running became part of my life thereafter. It was the first time I felt in control of my life again.

I’d always liked to cook and had been into food, but around this time I really started to look at nutrition. I started an Instagram account but I didn’t tell anyone about it, and I didn’t really want it to be my identity. It was just something I did carefree and for myself. We have this connotation in New York that food is a guilty pleasure, and I wanted to take that away and look at food in a different light. This was 2013, and I found there wasn’t a lot of information for endurance athletes when it came to nutrition and food - especially as a female.

One day, I was sitting in my college cafeteria and I got an email from Kara Goucher. I remember seeing the notification and just freaking out. She asked to speak with me on the phone, and she told me about this idea she had for a women’s running retreat where people would come and speak about their specific category. She wanted me to talk about food. I didn’t feel ready, but it’s one of those opportunities where you just have to jump into the water. Getting in front of a group of women who were almost double my age and talking about my experience with food was really challenging for me, but it’s what made me really believe that I’m onto something and this could be my career path.

I had a mission

Finishing an Ironman was easy compared to getting to the start line. It was one of the most difficult things I’ve done in my life. I had four stress fractures in my hip from my career in running, so I was really nervous about getting injured. I honestly didn’t think I was going to get to the start line healthy - I was convinced something was going to go wrong. I had been working with a coach, Coach Cane, since I was a runner, and he is one of the many reasons I got to the start line. The training was so difficult; a 100-mile ride one day and then getting up and doing a 17-mile run the next day. Training for an Ironman you learn a lot about yourself. You have to sacrifice a lot of things, but I had a mission, and I knew it was only going to be a short training block, so I was able to stay focused. I broke barriers and have done things in training that have carried over into my personal life, my career, and I’ve proven things to myself and been able to fall in love with myself a little bit more. I think I really needed that. And now that I’m not in training, I miss the structure and the craziness of it.

Food is medicine

I think what I’m doing is different because I myself am an endurance athlete and I have worked with professional athletes and everyday athletes. Through that process I realized that top level athletes are focused on one thing: their sport. So, nutrition is one thing that can fall by the wayside and not be important. As I spoke to more athletes I started to understand there was a big disconnect, and if there was a disconnect at the pro level, it must be even more significant for the weekend marathoner. My approach is very different in that I don’t count macros or break down nutrition in that sense, but moreso I try to make food approachable. A lot of people talk about nutrition in the sense of the superfoods and they do things that turn people away. My approach is that it should be accessible to everyone. That’s really what I try to do; whether you’re a professional athlete, everyday athlete or just someone who likes to work out, you should be able to understand what you’re eating and why you’re eating it. It should be easy for you.

One of the things I say is ‘food is medicine,’ and it definitely stems from my experience with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. I started to look at remedies and the holistic way to treat yourself. I looked at the food that was given to cancer patients in the hospital and it was, literally, making them sicker. On the other hand, I had chronic eczema my whole life, and once I started eating plant-based it completely went away. I cut out sugar, dairy, and meat, and I haven’t had eczema in eight years. I think proving those little things to people is going to be the incentive to try food as a solution to a lot of different issues we deal with on an everyday basis.

I deserve to be here

The day before my Ironman, I remember calling my coach and saying that I’m writing a blog post in my head about what I’m going to say when I drop out. I was super nervous about all this negative talk that I had in my mind, but it was a familiar sign for me because it happens a lot before a big race. But I also know what I’m like on race day: I only see the finish line. I think, in this instance, my fear stemmed from not knowing what was going to happen - I’d never run more than 17 miles, so it freaked me out a little bit. Plus, I knew the Triathlete Magazine cover was coming out shortly after the race, so there was that pressure in the back of my mind and if I didn’t perform, I didn’t know how I would deal with it. I decided to write down all my nerves and put all my fears on paper, and then looking at everything I’ve achieved and turning the negative talk into positive. I deserve to be here!

The morning of the race it was freezing cold and raining. As any athlete whose sport is outside knows, the one thing you can’t control is the weather, so there’s not much point worrying about it. I was focused on what I could control. We waited an extra hour at the start line because the current was so strong that the professionals couldn’t even make the turn at the buoys. The organizers ended up changing it from a 2.4-mile swim to just over a mile, and it was straight, with the current. I got out of the swim feeling pretty fresh, and the time was super fast with the current. I got into the changing room and completely changed. People were shivering, and I have to give a shoutout; the volunteers were incredible. After changing, I got onto the bike and saw my parents on the way out onto course. I knew the bike was going to be the most difficult for me and there are a lot of things I couldn’t control, especially in the rain, although it was raining and windy I was really confident with my bike. I decided to race with the 5.6 wheels which were the right depth, so I knew I would feel stable, even with the wind blowing like crazy!

I can do it

The bike course was a lot hillier than I thought. It was two loops, so the first circuit was reconnaissance so that you knew what you were getting on the second circuit. During the first loop, a guy passed me on the right, and as he was going by me, he caught the curb and went straight down. I stayed upright, and I didn’t look back but he probably had a concussion and his day was done. I was really shaken up by that, but I stayed upright and pushed on. At 100 miles there’s a downhill, and I couldn’t control my bike. I had a completely flat tire, and I hate to admit it, but through all my training I never learned to change a flat. I pulled over to the side of the road, crying. All of a sudden, the bike mechanic pulls over next to me - he just happened to be right there. He knew me because I’d been to see him the day before and as he was changing my tire he let me know that a lot of people had already pulled out of the race with hypothermia. It made me really grateful that I’d gotten to that point, and even more determined to finish. I only had 12 miles left on the bike, and I knew once I was off the bike that I was finishing because the run is just a matter of willpower. As it turns out, I had seven hours to complete the run.

I completely changed again before the run, I saw my parents again, and I also saw a bunch of my friends, so I felt great, and the endorphins and adrenaline were going. I quickly realized that a lot of people were on their second loop of the run - oh crap! I try not to get caught up in the comparisons, but sometimes you can’t help it. It was dark out, but I was just so elated that there wasn’t a doubt in my mind that I was finishing. Looking back, it’s a marathon, and anything could have happened, and I should have been preparing for that, but I was so excited. I thought of all the training, and all the people tracking me. At 13 miles you pass the finish line and hear the cheers, which sends a new wave of excitement through your body. After my second loop, I turned into the finish chute, and there’s so many bright lights and so much noise. I was weeping, and I don’t even think I heard my name being called. I knew this was a day that would stay with me forever. I proved to myself that if I want things, I could do it. If I train for something, I can do it. There’s nothing that I can’t do if I put my mind to it. It’s very easy to say that, but when you actually do it and prove it to yourself over a year, it’s incredible.

Sharing for good

After our initial meeting, Kara Goucher and I have become good friends, and it has opened a lot of doors for me by allowing other athletes and companies to see what I’m doing. The year after that first retreat, I went out to Boulder and cooked for her and Adam. At that time, Kara was training for the Olympic trials, and her coaches saw what I was doing, and they asked me to stay. I had just finished college so I wasn’t really tied down to a physical location or a job site, so I decided to stay and cook for her. It was really motivating to hear from her coaches that she had never trained so much, slept so little and recovered so fast. We knew we were on to something.

Nowadays, I continue to partner with athletes and with brands to create recipes and educate around nutrition. I’m working with adidas Runners, who have a holistic approach to running and believe you need strength, mobility, mindset, and nutrition to be the best runner you can be. I oversee our nutrition partners in New York and also do monthly workshops to teach our community about food and how to leverage it to help with your running. Also, this year I’m committed to sharing more about my story with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. I did a podcast interview a few years ago, and I remember being really vague about why I got into running. It has made me feel like I wasn’t being truthful to who I am.

I was preaching about everything else but me. After the interview ended, I told the host that I got into running because of my diagnosis, and she said: “why didn’t you share that?” I didn’t have a good answer. I was able to do an Ironman ten years to the day from my diagnosis, so I hope that by sharing my story, young girls can take my experience and turn it into something positive and see good in it.

That would mean the world to me.

Footnotes

Words by Lottie Bildirici, Cover Photo by Keith Montero, others photos as attributed. Edited by Cody Royle, Published by Travis McKenzie, Copyright NTSQ Sports Group Inc.

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FootNotes

Words by Lottie Bildirici, Cover Photo by Keith Montero, others photos as attributed. Edited by Cody Royle, Published by Travis McKenzie, Copyright NTSQ Sports Group Inc.

Colin O'Brady

Lottie Bildirici

Food Is Medicine

FootNotes

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My Incredible Journey

The Most Interesting Man In The World

Season 3